I feel you girl. Dating can be ROUGH. I have heard and experienced more horror stories than I’d like. I can totally understand wanting to throw in the towel and give up.
But please don’t.
The right relationship is out there for you I promise. It always happens when we least expect it and in some cases (*cough* me *cough*) the last person on earth we expect it with.
Here are some great tips to help you stay positive when you feel like giving up…
Visualization is a great way to get you back into that feel good energy. So take a few moments and find a quiet, comfortable place. Close your eyes and imagine what you want your dating life to look like. Imagine what it would be like to go on amazing dates with great guys. Imagine falling in love and what your lives will look like together. Include your 5 senses on this one and let your imagination run wild. Don’t hold back no matter how out there your mind wanders.
- Identify crappy beliefs you have about love, dating, and relationships
Belief systems come from things we were told and things we’ve experienced, but the great news is no matter what beliefs you have about something doesn’t mean you HAVE TO believe them. So take a few minutes and jot down the beliefs you have about finding love, dating, and relationships. Some might include love is great for some people, but I’ll never find it. Or my personal favorite there are no more good guys out there. Dating sucks. Love is for suckers. I’ll never find real love. I want to find love, but I’m afraid because I’ve had my heart broken. You get the picture. So do some investigative research. Remember there are NO judgments, just observations.
- Repeat your mantra as often as possible
Mantras are a great way to help break the cycle of old belief patterns and reinstall some new and improved ones. The key here is to choose one that makes you really feel something. You’re not just saying the words for the sake of saying them. It should elicit a strong emotion. The most powerful mantras usually come from identifying those old crappy beliefs first and then turning them around into a powerful statement. For instance, love is great for some people, but I’ll never find it becomes everyone is entitled to love including me and I WILL find it. Play around with it and see what sticks for you.
Had another bad date? Journal about it. He didn’t text you back? Journal about it. Fed up and frustrated? Journal about it. Journaling is a great and effective way to get out our anger and frustrations. It gives your emotions, thoughts, and feelings an outlet so you’re not constantly shoving them somewhere deep down inside. You have to let that shit out otherwise it will become this ugly rotten thing inside of you. Don’t let that happen.
- Look for other stories for inspiration
Ok, this is a tricky one so listen carefully. When you’re looking to other couples stories of how they met, fell in love and how wonderful their relationship is YOU ARE NOT COMPARING YOURSELF TO THEM. This is to help you stay hopeful and inspired that you WILL find an amazing relationship of your own, not to make you feel crappy about yourself. This should come from a place of curiosity rather than jealousy. It might even give you an idea of an avenue to try that you hadn’t even thought of. You never know. So keep an open mind and heart and look for other’s stories to help you stay inspired about love.